Is there such a thing as being too available? For example, you are a person that always gets invited to events because people know your support is guaranteed. Is this something you perceive as as good or bad? Furthermore, are you being used or are you simply a dependable person?
I remember a time when three different friends invited me to personal events each was hosting… on the same day. Due to my schedule, I was able to support two but not the other. This got me thinking. I’d been in similar situations before - rearranging my schedule to support and accommodate the same people. I was curious - would these same people be so willing to adjust their schedule to accommodate an event that I was hosting? I even tried to think about the few occasions when I solicited their support and consistently the response from them had been “crickets.” No call, no show.
What was causing this? Was their support for me lower on their list of priorities? Or was I giving the impression that it was okay for them to decline my invite? Was my passive reluctance to get a commitment from them the “out” they needed to avoid a commitment? Or was this simply evidence of a “one way” relationship where they honestly didn’t care enough to extend the same support?
What do or should you do if you find yourself in a “one way” relationship?
You should be honest with yourself as to whether your attending out of obligation or desire. Know that it’s okay to respectfully decline an invitation when you’re uninterested or unable to attend. You don’t always have to commit yourself to every event. Once I realized I was free to make this choice for myself, I was able to accept the decisions other made about supporting my events as well.
I love social media. I think its presence and impact on the world is phenomenal. The ability to connect people and bring awareness to issues across the globe is nothing short of amazing. Not to mention the marketing and advertising aspect of social media; I can’t count how many times I decided to try a product or visit a new place because I saw a testimonial on social media. Talk about great for business.
But (and there is always a but), sometimes I feel as if people have grown too reliant on social media to share information that deserves the courtesy of a phone call.
I can recall having a friend confront me about not knowing about her new relationship. When we spoke I thought, how could I have forgotten the details of that conversation?!? After a bit of back and forth she confessed, “Well I put it on Instagram!” insinuating that because it was shared on social media, I was obligated to know about it.
If it’s big news feel free to share away on social media, but remember that a phone call is sometimes more appropriate. Sometimes social media makes me feel a bit “old fashioned.” Forgive me but I feel strongly about fostering relationships the old fashioned way - like in person or by picking up the phone to connect where you can see people’s excitement (or lack thereof) and/or hear the expression on their voice. Status updates and shared pictures just don’t have the same effect.
Take care of yourself from the inside out. Treat your mind, body, and soul well. Live a life that is pleasing. Colossians 1:10 "That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God."